And etc…

The other day Matt and I rented Bee Movie from the Redbox. It was an average animated movie. First off, I really dislike bees. They are my sworn enemy. I think it’s that they fly and have weapons and I don’t trust their motivation. Also, they tend to really like my hair. Bees freak me out. This movie did not change my opinion of bees, although it really, really, really tried.

The focus of Bee Movie is Barry, a bee (surprise!). He doesn’t want to be a bee and is experiencing some sort of existential crisis. So he goes out to the human world and gets a girlfriend, or rather, a friend who is a girl who is human. I don’t believe they were actually doing anything illicit, although there were jokes about it. Then he sues the human world for taking bees’ honey. He wins, flowers all die, and the bees decide they can be bees and it’s ok. That’s my synopsis.

So, there’s a big push about two-thirds of the way in for admiring bees and all they do for us. Without them, we’d die from lack of oxygen because of a lack of plants, due to a lack of pollination! And…humans would be affected! Oh no. Did Al Gore have a hand in this script? (Note: I do believe in global warming and its badness.) And humans are bad people because we subjugate bees and force them to do our bidding. We are also portrayed as fat and greedy, while all bees are good and stuff.

So…while I’m quite alright with anthromorphizing animals and insects (see lolcats in action), I draw a line when we make out said animals to be all angelic and better than us. It is a somewhat crooked line drawn in a pen I took from a bank, but it is a line nonetheless.

Also, the woman (Vanessa, if you were wondering) who becomes Barry’s confidante has a stereotypically “bad” boyfriend. He’s a jerk. He wants to kill bees. He has self-esteem and happens to be somewhat competitive. Wait…that just described…me. No wonder I don’t like this film. The only character with a personality is a bad stereotype of myself if I were a man, and he’s the bad guy. Huh.

Also, the animation sort of made me want to throw up a couple of times (of course, I was also sick, so I don’t know whether that was me or the movie…but I think the movie did have something to do with it).

Overall, the whole movie was trying to be eco-friendly and it was way too obvious. Didn’t we already have this movie a few years back? What was it called…A Bug’s Life? Antz? Every Disney movie ever in which the stereotypical villain is really just a portrayal of my personality on an ugly person? Hmm. Apparently I have issues with the good guy being “good” and the bad guy being guilty of having a personality and desires. Because wanting things is not bad. Dammit.

So…no. I would not watch again. And I will still run screaming like a little girl from bees. Because I don’t believe they have good intentions, necessarily. Mostly because I don’t believe they can think. And in their fight or flight instinct, I’ve only ever witnessed fight. And they will almost certainly win because I have terrible aim and I am slow. A slow runner, that is.