And etc…

Hey you. It’s me. Been a while. Or maybe not really, if you think about how long time has existed, though you can’t really define existence without time. And the ethereal nature of time. And whoa. I’m getting all philosophic-like on this time business so I’m going to stop here. I haven’t even had anything to drink and I’m talking like that.

So, look at me blogging and whatnot. What have I been up to…hmmm…. Well, lately I’ve been trying to think of a hobby I should take up, which I may have mentioned before. Or maybe not. I do have some insular thoughts I don’t reveal to the outside world, after all. Hobbies, hobbies, hobbies. Turns out I’m not really actually interested in anything that takes effort. TV-watching is apparently not a hobby. People-watching, not a hobby. Because the definition of a hobby, I guess, is something that takes work. Well, life, I have WORK for that. I don’t need a hobby with which to do more work. So screw you, extracurricular activities that will make me a well-rounded and self-satisfied individual! Crap, I just used an exclamation point. Apparently I am quite passionate about this topic.

Do you think being overly critical of stuff is a hobby, or just a way of life? What about mocking people? Or getting really angry? And then repressing said anger so as not to do anything to get arrested? Is that a hobby or just a route to early death from heart failure?

I’m starting to think that hobbies are just dumb. Sure, it’d be nice to have an outlet. But that’s what I have “complaining on the Internet” for (also called Facebook). And no, Facebook is not a hobby. It’s a procrastination outlet. I’m pretty sure procrastinating is not a hobby. And going back to count all the times I’ve used hobby in this post is more of an obsessive compulsion than a hobby.

Also, anything that is really just exercise in disguise is not a hobby. So running and all its less exhaustive variants are not hobbies. Especially if it’s a marathon, because the only reason to run for that long is if you are running away from your entire campus falling into a hole caused by an earthquake. And your campus is 26ish miles wide and you happen to need to run from one side to the other to get out. Also, you do not have any wheeled device to use. And you’d better be the Flash (or happen to be experiencing a slow-motion earthquake) because otherwise you’re not going to make it.

So, hobbies = glorified activities. Perhaps they were invented by the guy who invented synonyms and the thesaurus. He was probably trying to put some more filler pages in there to really sell the thesaurus as practical and a good gift for holidays. It’s really too bad people just use the Microsoft Word thesaurus nowadays, thus nullifying the actual definition of synonym. It now just means: random words the computer gave you that may or may not have similar meanings to the word you have selected. And apparently, I think a lot. But no, that’s not a hobby. That’s just a thing I do. Also, I enjoy how meta it is to look up synonyms for the word “synonym.”